I have BIEBER FEVER!!!!!!

When I found out that Justin Bieber, who my sister is so enthusiastic about, had the number 1 album on the Billboards (yes, the freaking BILLBOARDS) I got the fever alright. My stomach started eating itself, I got a slight migraine, and I lost a large amount of hope for humanity.

I'm not the biggest advocate for mainstream music, but hey, Justin Timberlake, Beyonce, even Greenday (who I usually hate) have undeniable musical and performing talent. If they were to reach #1 I wouldn't be thrilled, but it would make sense...no complaints. But this guy ?!WHAT?!

I had to take a step back. I've only heard one of his songs, Baby baby baby baby baby baybeh ( thats how the song goes right?) and I knew that I disliked it. I decided before I write a negative review I should listen to some more of his songs, so I downloaded his album "My World 2.0" and decided to see what his world was really like...

About halfway through, I understood what his world was like. He falls or is in love with the perfect girl and he sings about how they are going to "make it"...FOR EVERY SINGLE ONE OF HIS SONGS!! This did it for me, bash bash bash bash bash. How uncreative is that? 11 songs all with the same message/plot/whatever you want to call it. I never knew that falling in love could be so unemotional. It does make sense though, considering his target age group. He gave the young girls what they wanted. Cheesy love songs that make girls infatuated, we've seen this formula many, many, many times before.

My instincts were correct. I am an album kind of guy. Rarely do I download individual songs and rarely do I keep an album that I don't like as a whole. An album with no momentum, no variety, no overall encompassing story gets a big "what the duck" from me. A ridiculous amount of "OOOO yeahs", "HEY's", and "woooaahhhs", analogies that are several steps down from Lil Wayne's (I won't put you down like a seasaw?), and obvious auto-tune are also reasons why this album should have never broken the top 10. I bet he didn't spend more than a months time in the studio making this album. I mean, he released 2 albums in 6 months. That alone shows his commitment to making top quality music <-----sarcasm to its fullest.

However, I am not saying that his album was totally horrible and absolutely without merit. He is a relatively good singer and would probably make it past the first round of American Idol. Music production was decent and there are some parts that I understand are catchy (when there are big names like Usher pulling the strings, mediocre production isn't too difficult)... But #1 is eating at my kindhearted soul. Out of alllll the music out there, this is what people are buying more than any other.

Am I just underestimating the power of the 7-15 year old girls? The power of having extremely well groomed hair? I think that people just need to get better sound-systems or earphones, that way, the differences in music quality will be more apparent. But honestly, I really don't know......

And as I'm about to conclude, I come to a horrible horrible realization. I spent my Saturday morning downloading Justin Bieber's album, listening to the whole thing, and wrote a lengthy blog about it.............. I can't believe he actually got to me. I can't believe I actually mentioned his name in my otherwise flawless blog-space. There is only one reason why I would do something so sickening.

I have it; the epidemic that is taking over the world, Bieber Fever.....OH god, help me...God help us all.

Here is what albums should be like. I realize its not the best, but I love the Gorillaz new album "Plastic Beach". I hope they do a full run-through at coachella. It would be such an epic ending to the festival.